Food For Thought....

A very dear and close freind said this and I wanted to share and get thoughts on it: Relationships should not be a means of not being alone or instant comfort during times of duress. Truly make sure that you are with someone for the shelter of love that their heart can provide you. That person should respect you and love you in person and while you are away. I am tired of the out of sight out of mind attitudes that so many have. Treat that person as if they were a winning lottery ticket and you will get your prize in return....Diana Thomas

So my question to you all: Do you want your prize or do you just by the ticket for the game? So many people get married for the wrong reasons comfort,security,a title, I can go on and on. Unfortunatley, we believe that marriage is the final result of goals from a female perspective we are groomed for it all of our lives. We are told to get an education, carry ourselves like a lady, we are taught to cook and keep house so we can settle down and live happily ever after. When I was in college I had friends that were there to meet their husband and not so much focus on their career. Don't get me wrong they would graduate and have a degree, but their goal was to find a husband that could take care of them and as soon as they were able to stop work they did.

Then we have women that get married and want to put limitations on what they will do sexually for their husbands. Ladies what you won't do someone else will. It is ok to embrace the inner freak for your husband. Your union is blessed and covered by God. Stop telling your man no and not being willing to try things. NO!!! I'm not saying bring other women in your bed or do any S&M crazy stuff. But if he wants you to put on an outfit, put it on. If he wants you to role play, hell ask for the script. Don't be so closed minded that you loose what you signed up for and end up hurt in the end.

Men stop marrying women because you are getting old and its time. Wrong answer! Don't let any woman pressure you using that either. Age is just that age, it isn't the defining factor to making a decision that will and can change your life forever. If you aren't ready for marriage don't do it, point blank simple. If she loves you and is the one she will wait until you are ready so the marriage can be genuine and have a real chance to stand the test of time. Therefore, being out of sight will never mean out of mind.

Well these are just a few of my thoughts on this. I would love to hear yours.

I'll leave you with this quote:

YOU KNOW YOU ARE IN LOVE WHEN YOU CAN'T SLEEP, BECAUSE REALITY IS FINALLY BETTER THEN YOUR DREAMS...DR. SEUSS

~Dreamer

Food For Thought....

Hello world, have you missed me? I know I've been gone for sometime, but sometimes life happens and you have to deal with it. With doing so it gave me time to begin to put things in perspective and try and put things in order and motion. It is a slow task cause change doesn't happen over night, especially when it is life changes.

I have been working on my book once again diligently and with doing so questions have come to mind. I thought I would put them on the blog hoping to get some insight. As I write and piece together stories, memories etc., for the book it makes me question men. I asked a question to some not to long ago and I thought I should put it on here. My question: Why is it that some men have to have a wife, a girlfriend, and a ride or die chick? Isn't your ride or die suppose to be equivalent to all?

This has really been on my mind. I don't think as teenagers or young adults we think about this at all. I can speak for myself and growing up where I did my goal was always to be the ride or die. That friend, your right hand, lover and the one that was there through the good and the bad. Now I see so many people getting married because supposedly it is the ultimate goal. Why isn't happiness the ultimate goal, meaning it could be marriage, career, piece of mind or just living.

We get so caught up in the "American Dream" and lose our own dreams. I have sacrificed so much doing what I thought would please everyone else and now I am realizing that I got caught up in the dream as well. There comes a time when you have to wake-up before you miss living your life because the entire time you were sleep living in a dream instead of living your life.

Just my take on it tell me what is yours?

Won my heart....

What happens when you meet that special someone and you know you can't have them? That was the case with Alexis she just relocated to the DC area and life was great. The biggest downfall was her relationship, of 4 years. Tony was the perfect mate; a friend, supportive, loving and successful, but his insecurities were slowly putting a wedge between them. Right before she accepted her new job he had proposed and now she was second guessing her entire relationship. "What is next?, can they get passed this? or does she need to cut all ties, are some of her daily thoughts.

Luckily, one of her closest friends lived in DC and was there to show her there to show her the ropes. Lisa and Alexis met in college and were practically inseparable ever since. This was the first time in 10 years they lived in the same state so they were enjoying every minute of it. This was one of the main reasons Tony was feeling more and more uncomfortable, because Lisa was single and loved to let it be known that she wanted it to stay that way. Even though Lisa was a very sought after attorney for her work, as well as her looks she was in no hurry to be settled down. Therefore, after work on Friday the two of them hit the DC scene for drinks and mingling.

This particular Friday changed it all for Alexis and she wasn't even expecting it: